Listening: tougher than you think
For the past couple of days, I’ve immersed myself in webcasts, articles and books about sales. The planning for the new business is coming along and it looks like I’m going to be front and center handling most of the client interaction.
One of the themes that keeps coming up is that to sell, you must listen: Listen in an attempt to truly empathize with another person. Don’t listen to judge, advise or advance yourself. Just listen to understand. (N.B. I think a lot of my ideas on this subject have come from Stephen Covey).
But there is one more step too. It was brought to my attention by Keith Ferrazzi’s webcast. You also have to share something of yourself along the way. Be vulnerable, be human. It’s your insecurity that makes you human – and it’s a trait that everyone can relate to. It’s hard to open up to someone who presents him/herself as pleasantly perfect.
After learning all of this wonderful information, I was talking to my brother today and instead of listening, I immediately started acting the big brother and giving him loads of advice – advice that I don’t think he was looking for. After I hung up the phone, I was frustrated with myself. Am I this boneheaded? Perhaps I am. I suppose old habits die hard.
All of this to say that listening is tough. Much tougher than you think it is. Don’t believe me? Try it tonight – don’t judge, advise, coach or anything else – just listen and see what you learn.
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PS - One great resource I found was Tom Peter’s 111 Ridiculously Obvious Thoughts On Selling. Enjoy.
It amazes me how many vendors I’ve spoken to who talk talk talk and don’t take the time to understand the problem I’m facing before getting into their pitch.
The really good salespeople ask what I think *after* their pitch, to see if it’s a slam dunk, a poor fit, or somewhere in between.
Kareem